you guys were way drunker than both of me
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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