we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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