We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
