And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
