Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
