i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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