Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize