We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I think I won the penis lottery.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
