i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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