It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
