Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
