she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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