last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
