Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize