hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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