she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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