OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
