none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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