omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
