Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
