So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
