How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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