Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
