That's intense
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
