He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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