just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Randomize
