I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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