Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize