I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
