I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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