Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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