Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
you win again, gameday.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
