whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
