The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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