Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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