Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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