i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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