Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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