just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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