What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
