I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
