At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
