you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
