Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
