how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize
