well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize