I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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