So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize