what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
my sisters under your porch take her home
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
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