Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
