Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
