how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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